Eight years later we tried again. But this time we hired a captain who had sailed through the ‘perfect storm’ and survived, so my family was in much better hands! As we entered the bay, history repeated itself – you guessed it, no wind. As I began to pray, the wind picked up, and we were off. My family held on for all their worth and my husband asked ‘manly’ questions about how a yacht is engineered to keep from tipping over.
My relationship with God reminds me of sailing. Sometimes I feel the rush of His presence, I feel in tune with God and I feel surrounded by Him. But other times I feel like there is a wall up between us. No matter how much I pray, seek His face, and examine my heart for sin, I still feel like I am worshipping a distant God.
I believe that at times we feel distant from God, because God wants us to hunger for him. When we didn’t have wind, we longed for it, it consumed all our thoughts. But once we had wind, we enjoyed the rush of the journey so much, that we started to forget that wind was powering us along.
In Mark 5:25 we are told of the woman who suffered with bleeding for twelve years. She was considered unclean & could not have any physical contact with people or even items they touched. After twelve years of isolation, humiliation and suffering, I am sure that she struggled with feeling distant from God. So what did she do? She passionately pursued Jesus, even to the point that she touched him, fully knowing that she would make him unclean with her touch. Jesus rewarded her pursuit by saying, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering “.
In Jeremiah 29:13, God promises that we will find God when we seek him with all our heart. When you don’t feel the presence of God, but you diligently seek Him, you will begin to see his hand, his provision, his presence. My friend, take heart, don’t give up. God wants to be close to you, he longs to speak to you. He desires a deep, connected relationship with you, but He is waiting for you to passionately pursue His presence.